Dentist?! Dentist!!! I DON’T NEED NO STINKING DENTIST!!!

I should go to the dentist more often! I’m not the best at dental care, but still no cavities along with a wake of incredulous hygienists. At this rate, when I finally kick the bucket with all else wasting away, I’ll still have a perfectly healthy set of teeth staring back at the mortician!

Imagine how lucky my kids would be if teeth were heirlooms?

My tombstone will probably read something like… Blah, blah, blah… and survived by his wife, kids and 32 adoring teeth who miss his gums very much!